Dumbells? Not so dumb.

My mum just bought a couple of dumbells.
Why?
The usual answer. Losing weight.
It's not just that.
To me dumbells are not dumb.
Lets see. Benefits:
*Paper weight.
*If you're living in an apartment-Annoying neighbours down below......You know how.
*A great excuse for getting out of doing chores, going to school dot dot dot. How? Simply pick an area such as the foot, and keep hitting till you hear a crack. That means you've broken your bone! Congratulations!
* Getting rid of blabber mouths. Pretend that you're working out while you talk to someone. Stay calm, and when you can't take it anymore hit your friend with an excuse-Oops my finger slipped.
*Imaginary Nintendo Wii. Now you can imagine having a Wii in your very own house! Imagine playing Wii games such as baseball. Simply Swing you dumbell as if its a remote. If it flies out of your palm and cracks your tv, erm look on the bright side at least you know the tv is no good! Not only that but parents will be afraid that will happen again so most probably you would get a new tv and Nintendo Wii or you could be in your very own jailcell for years.
*No hammer? Dumbells will save the day. Its super effective. It's practically as heavy as a hammer. So you get 2 in 1 service man. Once you get tired of hammering, do some lifts and your muscles would be ready for the next part of the 'hammering process'.